Have you ever felt a sense of nostalgia, a memory that tingles your heart, hits you in gut on seeing a gift that someone had given you a long time back ?
Especially when that someone is rarely around you ? Especially when its someone you love? When almost the entire span of your relationship is spent in waiting for their arrival, on planning those few days and then on missing them when they leave.
Of course you have a million selfies and pictures that you make sure to click, to revisit all those moments in hours of loneliness. You have the gifts they got for you . You have the chats . But then all these things belong to you. More to you than to them . Because they gave it to you.
But what if you have something that belongs to them . I am lying besides a laptop right now. Have you realised the feeling when you are with them , for days altogether, your phone doesn’t ring , there are no beeps, your last update on instagram is days back if not weeks and your replies to messages less prompt. Because , hey, your phone’s best friend, their phone is alongside. Their laptop is at rest too, not needing to play movies that reminds him of you.
And in today’s times that’s the most proximate of your belongings.
So , I have his laptop . I needed it to work. And right now I am lying besides it , with somehow my mind tricking my heart into thinking that he is around . Because his belonging is around. Not the gifts he gave me . But something with which he spends so much of his time. Something that has the essence of his touch over and over again. The faded keys of the keypad, the uncleaned screen, the haphazardly arranged folders, the way movies are put, a folder that says how much he loves chick flicks, romcoms, more than action movies, his taste of music , our pictures from years before, his photographed postcards that he sent me , his work .
Isn’t that what everyone of us is made of? Isn’t that our own small world ?
What more could remind you of their presence?
What gift could replace this feeling of belongingness?
So for the days this black flat little box of his essence and personality is with me , I guess m gonna fall asleep by its side .
To all , Do try this with your one !